Destiny’s Journey [rough draft]
Tuesday afternoon. Another day of watching The Steve Wilkos show, and Jerry Springer. I should try something new, but, today is just my normal routine of watching TV and going on my laptop to research about ghosts. Yep, just normal. But, very boring.
Well, here’s a little something about me:
1. My name is Destiny Journey. I am 13 and I am in 8th grade.
2. I have one sister who is the popular one at school, and a brother who is a jock.
3. I express myself in different ways than other people.
4. I hate people who make fun of me because I know I am psychic and I love ghosts. Not to mention cats.
5. My mom is divorced and my dad walked out on us when I was 5. My mom and I are not very close. She loves my sister Kathy, because Kathy is the popular cheerleader at school. She also loves Blake, my older brother because he is the star of his football team.
Blake always picks on me for being what they call, a “loser”.
He just doesn’t understand that ghosts are very cool to talk to and to know how they feel about living things living in their house. Which I think is very awesome in a creepy way.
My mom and I were never close. I have a feeling that my mom is afraid of me. Right when I come back from school, I go straight upstairs into my room and talk to my “friends”. By friends I mean ghosts and my imaginary best friend, Hope. Hope has black hair, a pretty face, and always dark clothes. Basically like me. As for real friends, I have none. Everyone is freaked out by me, and I don’t know why. Now, it is time for dinner. All I have to do is go downstairs, say “Hi” to my mom and get my food and go upstairs before the commercials end. The food is Lasagna, which is my favorite, and with a side-dish of lima beans. Yum! Also, I have some Sprite to go along with it.
Now, I am finished with dinner and it is 8:30 PM. It is very dark outside, and my bed time is at 10:00 PM, so I think I will go to the neighborhood pond and do some searching of ghosts.
I think it’s going to be really fun.
As I go down the hallway, I try to do a little spying on my siblings. Kathy’s door is opened a little and Blake talks really loudly so it will be a piece of cake hearing him. I go near Kathy’s door, she’s talking on the phone. Probably with her best friend, Gina. As I listen more closely, I know it is Gina. They are talking about cheer-leading, and how they “need” to lose weight and other girly weird stuff.
Now, it is Blake’s turn to be spied on. He is talking on the phone to Brad, one of the football players. I couldn’t agree more that Brad is very cute and should I say, sexy. I use my psychic abilities on him. Like, when he comes over. I know the exact time when he comes, and it’s perfect so I can change my clothes and look my best. He seems to like it by his thoughts. I always brush my teeth before he comes over, too. Smiling is a perfect way to win a really cute guy’s heart. Or, at least that’s what I think. I can sense that he is coming over in 30 minuets. I guess my plans of hunting ghosts are tarnished, only for today.
As I try to look my best, I pick out a dark purple shirt with a pair of Le’Dawn short-cut jeans. I try to style my hair. By style, I mean putting my hair in a pony-tail and a little bow clip on my bangs. I guess I look decent.
Then, Brad comes. He rings the doorbell which tweets like a bird for exactly 10 seconds, and comes in with his shoes on. A big “NO” for my mom.
He is then greeted by Blake and continues to talk while going upstairs, unaware that he might trip.
He goes into Kathy’s room and say’s “hi”. He then walks into my room and says “hi” as well. I, of course, blush and say “hey” back. He walks out of my room and closes the door. I smile to myself, and then quickly snap out of my Barbie-like state to focus on reality. Good ’ole reality.
It is now 9:30 PM and I have to go take a shower. I strip off my clothes, put my clothes in the dirty clothes basket, get all of my special shampoos and conditioners, then turn on the hot water as I start to lather my wet hair. The water soon turns to ice-cold as someone flushes the toilet in the bathroom in Blake’s room. We all have our own bathrooms, decorated how we wanted it. Mine is checkered with black and purple squares, Kathy’s bathroom is pink with white stripes, and Blake’s is a 49er themed bathroom.
I finish my shower as I grab my violet towel out of the towel rack, and I go into the hallway with the towel wrapped around my body. I step into my room as I see Brad sitting on my bed with my “Book Of Drawings”. “Hey, Destiny. Blake was on the phone, so he told me to look at your drawing book. He said it was cool and that you wouldn’t mind.” Brad said. I was dumbfounded, and I didn’t really understand why. “Oh, yea. It’s ok. I don’t mind at all. So, do you like any?” I replied sheepishly. “Yea, I loved the your drawing titled “Wolfed Moon:. It was really awesome.” Brad replied with a huge smile o
Theres more to it but yahoo cut it off://
It has spelling errors and grammer erros i know i know but i need opinions if you liek ti or not
Very good. You’re really a good writer.
Comments
Very good. You’re really a good writer.
References :
I like the story line. It sounds relateable in a kind of nonrelatable way. unless your physic of course. haha. its seems like it is going to be a great story.
but if you dont mind me saying there are a couple things that i might change. these are just suggestions.
there is something about the sister AND brother being popular that doesnt seem real. maybe instead of the sister being a cheerleader have her just be really snobby and like wants to be a fashion designer or something. so she is the annoying type that will blurt out and get upset if she broke a nail. so she would not be like Destiny at all. and of course would still get on Destinys nerves just as much as her being a cheerleader. (if this makes any sense at all)
another part that kinda seemed werid to me was
"The food is Lasagna, which is my favorite, and with a side-dish of lima beans. Yum! Also, I have some Sprite to go along with it."
it sounds kinda choppy to me. maybe consider revising that part.
well over all a very good story. i wish i would have came up with it myself. Bravo.
References :
just suggestions. but very good story.
College English Class. Etc.
omg… i love it
haha man! i wanted to read more about Brad and how’s she in there wrapped in her towel..
damn it!
its good so far!!!
References :